Sunday, September 25, 2022
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I’m not sure if I will ever understand the unconditional love my Grandma showed me. As far back as I can remember, I couldn’t wait to spend time with her. She looked at me like I was everything a granddaughter should be. Whatever I asked for, she almost always said yes. We would play games for hours and never get bored or run out of things to laugh about.
When I was about 4 or 5 years old, there was this one day that I remember wondering if the love she had for me was real. It seemed so perfect, and I knew I didn’t deserve to be loved like that. Maybe I was just hungry or didn’t sleep well the night before, but I decided to test how much she cared about me. I started saying the meanest things I could possibly think to say to her. To be honest, I don’t remember what those things were that I said, but I remember being surprised that she didn’t get angry, and that the sadness on her face was one that I could feel inside me, too. I apologized, and she knew I didn’t mean it, and we never told anyone about that moment. I didn’t get in trouble, even though I knew what I said deserved a serious punishment.
I think my Grandma is one of the reasons I find God’s love easier to believe in than most people. Searching to understand and explain God’s love has been a significant part of my life’s journey, and perhaps it’s because deep down, I wish every child on earth could have a Mama Pat or a Papa Tom.
Throughout history, God has revealed many shades of His love to and for His children. And in Jesus, we get to encounter the best of that love today and for eternity.
1 John 4:18 reads:
“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.”
My Grandma could have punished me that day, but she chose not to. And I never wanted to use those words again, because I hated how much they had hurt her, especially since I didn’t even mean them. She reflected to me the same love God has convinced her was real through His Son, Jesus. Not just that day, but the kind of woman she was everyday to me, to her husband, to her kids, and to everyone who was lucky enough to encounter her sweet nature and pure heart.
As much as I treasure all the joyful memories we made… waking up to an amazing breakfast when I slept over at her house, our inside jokes, vacations that didn’t always go as planned, or dancing around their house because they somehow found all the weird shows I made for them entertaining, I think this memory sticks out to me today because I know if a human can love me that much, it makes sense that the love I’ve felt for and from God is so big and crazy and wonderful.
My Grandma has to be one of the most near-perfect women to ever walk the planet. Even the way she embraced her imperfections was perfect because she taught me that life is more fun when we can make mistakes, embarrass ourselves, learn lessons, and laugh about it later.
She passed onto me a faith that God’s perfect love is even more trustworthy and powerful than anything we can give each other, and His grace gives us the ability to love each other even when we least deserve it. Now she’s resting in the Forever Home He’s made for us, and I get to cherish all our times on earth together with deep gratitude and look forward to a whole bunch more years of silly adventures we’ll get to have together with Him someday.
